The Love Guru? Thoughts on Esther Perel

Last week I sat down with roughly half of Melbourne's love-distressed population to hear Psychotherapist Esther Perel speak. Perel has gained international notoriety and pop culture status for her approach to modern relationships and sexuality, and her popularity seems to be at its tidal peak. The air of the 5,500 seater concert hall was filled with equal parts hope and desperation as we waited for the 'intimate evening' to start. Her talk began with a series of questions. As the lights in the concert hall lifted, we were told, "If the answer applies to you, stand up." Her first question, "Who here has been dragged along tonight?", saw a wave of chino-clad men rise from their seats. Following her second question, "Who here is in a relationship and came with their partner this evening?", the chinos were joined by an accompanying wave of sundresses and heeled ankle boots. The real blow came with her final question, "Who here wants out of the relationship they're in?" A scatter of brave individuals stood. The internal screams of those who wished to stand, but didn't, were palpable.  Using terms like 'relational ambiguity' and 'erotic intelligence', Perel explained the many shifts relationships have been subject to over the last 100 years. Armed with a clear concept for ea... Last week I sat down with roughly half of Melbourne's love-distressed population to hear Psychotherapist Esther Perel speak. Perel has gained international notoriety and pop culture status for her approach to modern relationships and sexuality, and her popularity seems to be at its tidal peak. The air of the 5,500 seater concert hall was filled with equal parts hope and desperation as we waited for the 'intimate evening' to start. Her talk...