I’m 29 years old, and I grew up in inner-city Naarm, in a series of inner-city government housing apartments. I currently live on Boonwurrung land in Naarm (Melbourne).
I just finished my Masters of Fine Art, and I work as a writer, artist and model. My art is mostly woven textile pieces, as well as painting and sculpture. I love just being able to play. I can spend hours painting, and it feels like it’s only been minutes.
I grew up in the nineties when new-age parenting was having a bit of a moment. I learned about sex pretty young, maybe at age four or five, by reading the kids’ book ‘Where Did I Come From?’
"When it comes to sex, I’m still not as confident as I would like to be. I’m quite self-conscious, but with time, I’ve learned to own my sexuality. "
If you haven’t seen this book, you really should google it. The illustrations are the best – complete with an anthropomorphic sperm wearing a top hat. As a result, I very much knew about sex in the abstract. I knew about the body parts, but I don’t really remember retaining much of the information.
Other bits came in dribs and drabs: being ten years old and watching Cruel Intentions on late-night TV with the volume low, the scene in Titanic with the foggy car and the smudged handprint, whispers at sleepovers where older girls leered and asked, “Do you know what a rainbow kiss is?”.
When it comes to sex, I’m still not as confident as I would like to be. I’m quite self-conscious, but with time, I’ve learned to own my sexuality. Previously, I might not have worn tight dresses that showed a lot of cleavage, or posted selfies wearing bathers or underwear. But the more I put myself out there, the more ‘at home’ I feel in my body and in my sexuality.
I feel most connected to my sexuality on first or second dates. They can be really fun and sexually charged. I might have put on a form-fitting dress that accentuates my curves. I love enjoying the anticipation. Kissing is, by far, my favourite part of being intimate with another person – it can be really fun and playful.
The greatest lesson I’ve learnt about sex is to invest in a good vibrator. I remember years ago, Flex Mami used to always say, “facilitate your nut,” recommending a clit-sucking vibrator and holding a lot of stock in what Flex Mami says, I did it. And, she was right!